Meeting/we be goblins too

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We Be Goblins Too!®

We be goblins! We crunch birds!
Snip off legs and cut in thirds!
Catch the turkey! Snatch the rook!
Pluck the feathers—make them cook!
Roast them drumsticks, boilthem eyes!
Mash guts gummy for bird pies!
Once it all iswell and chewed,
We still hungry—YOU be food!

Background

You are the heroes of the Licktoad Tribe, living legends after you triumphed against the terrible goblin cannibal Vorka and recovered many fireworks from her lair. Your tribe used the fireworks to great effect, but one day while you were out scrounging for more fireworks, adventurers came into the swamp and wiped out your tribe. You returned to your hometo find it in ruins.

Now homeless, you have decided to travel to the closest tribe of goblins you know about—the Birdcrunchers. Maybe they’ll have room for you to join! Only, now that you’ve arrived in Birdcruncher territory, something seems wrong. The Birdcrunchers appear unusually nervous and frightened, cowering around the entrance to their cave. They aren’t even trying to defend their territory. And now, a wrinkled old goblin with bulging eyes is waddling out of the crowd, approaching you. She’s obviously some sort of shaman—maybe even the chieftain. If anyone here knows whether or not you can join the tribe, it’d likely be her!

Info on playing goblins

  1. HORSE HATE: Goblins hate horses
  2. DOG HATE: They hate dogs too.
  3. GOBLINS RAID JUNKYARDS: Love garbage piles
  4. GOBLINS LOVE TO SING: Goblins love to sing creepy songs.
  5. THEY’RE SNEAKY: They like to hide in odd places like stacks of firewood, rain barrels, under logs, under chicken coops, in ovens….
  6. THEY’RE A LITTLE CRAZY: They are goblins… they don’t think things through.
  7. THEY’RE VORACIOUS: Goblins eat more than they make so they raid to get more to eat.
  8. THEY LIKE FIRE: They love to burn things especially other peoples things.
  9. THEY GET STUCK EASILY: Their big heads get them stuck sometimes.
  10. GOBLINS BELIEVE WRITING STEALS YOUR SOUL: Enough said.

There are pregenerated (zipped PDF) characters available directly from Paizo.

I need to find a fifth character, which I may generate myself.

The adventure is built around these guys and their less than optimal character builds, so I suggest we just enjoy them as they are.